Saturday, February 4, 2012

Hold the Crystals -- Sometimes You Just Need a Human

In case you've never considered that your healing journey can be like being a chef in the kitchen of your own life, grab a coffee and read on. I love my work as a healer. I'm also something of a foodie. When I'm not working with clients, there's nothing I love more than whipping up culinary creations in the kitchen. I love the culinary adventure, the possibilities, and the sensual aspect of cooking. The mixing, blending, the colors, the textures, the smells -- the whole process is like being in one joyous sandbox to me.

But sometimes in the kitchen, you might be wanting to make a recipe that calls for a specific ingredient, like cumin. And, doggone it, you might discover you are out of cumin. What do you do?

I don't know if you know the flavor of cumin. It's an odd spice, for sure. Like any other seasoning, it has its own unique flavor profile, it's own timbre and characteristic.

Well, you could try to keep going with your cooking. You could substitute, say, curry for cumin. My wonderful husband sees nothing wrong with doing that. After all, they're both spices, right? In his mind, it's close enough. The dish will still be edible, so who cares?

But a foodie like me might slap myself on the forehead and wonder how anyone could consider cumin being anything close to a substitute for curry. But hey, that's because I'm really tuned in to these things.

Yet it's kind of like this in the journey of self healing. Sometimes you really need a specific vibration to get to where you need to go next. Nothing else will quite do it. Yes, there are a billion ways to heal. But they aren't all the same. And sometimes, if your system needs cumin and you're out of it in your kitchen, you've got to go out and get the cumin. The other spices in your spice cabinet just won't work. You could try to substitute, and the result might be still be only ok at best. Or it might feel downright disappointing. Like something is missing.

I see a lot of people in this situation. They often come into my office after already having done a lot of work on themselves. They're like magnificent chefs in the middle of the creative process. But sometimes there's been a critical piece missing. It's very noticeable, when I look into their aura. And it makes a big difference. Would you like to know what it is?

It's the impact of a human. Hopefully a healing and wise human. Someone who has been where you have been personally and can guide you through it. There are some things in the soul healing process (and hence, the body) that only a human can provide that other techniques cannot.

Don't get me wrong, I think non-human methods of working can be wonderful. I'm referring to things such as:
  • using crystals
  • journaling
  • self-Reiki and self-energy treatments
  • meditation
  • white light bubbles of protection
  • positive affirmations
  • visualizations
All of these things are provide benefit. They all have value, though different things work for different people. I'm all for whatever works for people.

But the more I work with people, the more I notice that, for many people, these solitary tools just aren't enough. If they were, there wouldn't be so many people that do all of these who still feel a lack inside, or still feeling cut-off or triggered by other people. And then they feel frustrated with their lack of progress.

I think it's because these tools are more about coping and reducing stress than anything. They do work. Up to a point, sure. But they don't seem to really help push people to a new personal level. People don't always grow. They just sort of "deal" with things better.

I'll give a you a simple example. Recently, I had a client I'll call "Matt" come in. A tall man with a deep voice and hazel eyes, Matt wanted me to balance his energy. He said he just felt a bit 'off' inside. He wanted to feel more at peace with things. But he also said he was much better than he used to be. He had picked up yoga and meditation recently, and it really helped him with many things he had been struggling with for a long time.

"Nothing really matters anymore," he said, almost proudly. "Nothing bothers me. It's just not woth worrying about. None of this," he gestured with his hands to the room and his corporeal presence, "really matters matters anymore."

"OK, that's fine," I said, nodding. And as I listened to him talk about meditation and how nothing mattered anymore, I could see how deeply sad this man really was. His energy field was boiling hot and heavy, with grey and mottled dark blue everywhere in his aura. A big angry bulge of red energy spewed out from his midsection. I knew beyond any doubt that Matt was extremely angry inside. Even as he smiled at me, I could feel his rage. Although he never said anything about it, I saw clairvoyantly that Matt had major conflicts in his relationships with women. He needed to make some big decisions, and he was avoiding doing it. Instead, he was disappearing into spiritual practices to avoid feeling things. He had great spiritual insights on some ideas. But his emotional energetic layer felt like a desert to me.

I asked him how it would be if he were to feel the energy of his feelings more. Would that be OK, as a start? I asked him. I said it would help balance his energy.

He stared at me, horrified. That was definitely not what he was looking for.

"I've had enough of the drama," he said, flatly. "I want to find a way to be more at peace, more spiritual, accepting. I want to surrender more into the oneness."

"Well, that sounds good, Matt," I said. "But what if surrender doesn't necessarily mean to do nothing? What if your spirit is actually calling you to find a way to take an action through all of this?"

Matt stared at me. I smiled back. After all, it was just a question. There's no right or wrong answer. It's just a possibility.

We finished the session, and Matt left. I could tell he was a bit disconcerted. We had touched on something very poignant for him. And I understood why. He had come in wanting me to help him avoid more of his feelings. And I wasn't about to do that.

And I think he somehow knew that, on some level. And that was why he came in to see me. There was a part of his spirit that already knew what he needed to do. He needed to waken to his feelings again.

And you know, it's still ok. We all need stress reducers! Matt found help in yoga and meditation. It worked, up to a point. It helped him cope. But he had reached a point where he wasn't getting any further. He was using these practices as a way to avoid expressing his own feelings. Perhaps in these practices there might even be great emotional release moments. But to me, sometimes it only goes so far.

After all, if my deepest wounds involve connecting with people, and I do all of my most honest emotional releases privately away from people, how do I ever connect with people? It would be like escaping, rather than engaging.

I think this happens because meditation and the other tools tools I mentioned rely mostly on the upper chakras, instead of the lower ones. If you're wrestling with an issue, you're more likely to float into your head/upper chakras about it. It's less likely you'll drop down into your lower chakras. The lower chakras are harder for most people to access because that is where intense feeling is stored. They are very personal power centers. So to reach these power centers, it's more effective to get a personal kind of help, such as by using a guide or healer, than relying only on something transpersonal, like crystals.

After all, for many people on the spiritual path, the deep wound inside is about feeling cut off from other people. Or, it's about feeling like they don't matter on the planet. These are not things that can be fully healed by going into more solitude or using crystals or saying positive affirmations. They are very personal wounds. They often need a human, hopefully a wise and compassionate one, to hold a specific vibration that that person needs. If there's a wound of not feeling safe around people, the healing of that wound has to come from an experience of feeling safe around a person. It's the only way to reclaim that energetic in the auric field. There's just no other substitute spice in the spice cabinet that can do this.

I see a lot of people trying to substitute the personal with things like positive affirmations or visualizations or metaphysical, philosophical and transpersonal thought. But it just doesn't work. It's not the the right vibration. It's not that these things are wrong. They're just not enough. People end up feeling like they'relying to themselves. Or they get so disappointed with themselves when their meditations and positive affirmation don't seem to work.

Cumin, or the impact of a human guide/teacher/healer, was necessary for me when I went through my healing. I was then able to to grow to generate that spice for myself. So now, because I'm a human-who-has-cumin, when I work, I transmit this vibration through more than just my hands. It all looks very ordinary. But there's actually an interactive energy dance going on. And it lets peoples' energetic systems build new neuropathways while we work together. It's like peoples' energetic systems go, "Cumin! Cool!"

These days, many people feel lost inside, and do not know what it is like to be deeply understood. I know, because I was one of them once. And because I recognize it when I see it. "Oh, you just need some cumin!" is what I want to say to people. People would look at me crazy. But the fact is, cumin is missing from the grand celestial spice cabinet of a lot of peoples' lives. This is why there is so much deep sadness.

But once people get an energetic taste of cumin, they recognize it inside. It's a sort of, "Oh yeah, that's what it is! That's what I need, right now on my healing path!" And then, they finally start to create that energetic pathway for themselves.

So if what you're doing is working isn't working, maybe you need a different spice. Maybe it's not that you're not visualizing right or meditating right. Could it be that you're using metaphysical-solitary-bay-leaf in your sauce, when you really need personal-connective-cumin?

Well, that's enough for today. I love being the cumin in peoples' kitchens. Go forth into your kitchens, and I look forward to hearing about your mouthwatering creations!

What do you think? I welcome your comments!

Adele Wang
Certified energy healer and mentor, helping smart, intuitive, perfectionist women create happiness and success in an imperfect world

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